Baja Bound Off-Road Motorcycle Adventure: Part Three

Mike’s Sky Rancho

A view from the top of the desert (5000+ feet). The white stuff is snow.

Mike’s Sky Rancho: Come on up, the party’s just beginning…

When last we visited, you will recall that our tour group had wimped out after only 77 miles of off-road fun in freezing rain and snow. The wimpees, including yours truly, all opted to tough it out for the rest of the trip to Mike’s Sky Rancho in Baja Bound’s crew cab truck; leaving our tour guides, Tim and Chris, to fend for themselves on their motorcycles. We got to be good friends on the ride as the truck was built to carry five or six normal size people—not seven bikers, mostly on the “manly” size.

We arrived at Mike’s about sundown. On the way up, Tom, our driver, filled us in on the history of the Ranch. The present Mike, who appears to be about 50 years old, inherited the ranch from his father, an American. The elder Mike had built the facility as a hunting lodge and it has seen its share of famous and notorious guests. Mike lives in Tijuana, where he operates a nightclub (Bobby wondered if it was the club he had heard about when he was stationed at 29 Palms, but the club he was thinking of featured donkey acts). Mike dives up to the ranch every weekend in an old van and brings most of the provisions in with him. The ranch is open all week, but Mike is only there on weekends.

On the way up to the ranch, about five or six miles out, Tom pointed out where an old airfield used to be. This was used by Mike’s guests to fly in and out. The Mexican Federales hassled him so much about the airfield, suspecting that it was also used for drug smuggling, that Mike eventually closed it. The roads are in pretty bad shape and it’s a chore getting there by truck or car. Motorcycles are definitely the way to go. Many of the roads we are on are part of the various Baja off-road races run all year long.

My guess is that Mike’s isn’t used all that much for hunting anymore and that the bike and off-road people are his main clientele.

We arrived ahead of most of the other guests (motorcyclists), which was fortunate, because some of the rooms are unheated. The rooms that are heated use diesel heaters that do a good job of heating (but be sure to open a window, as the ranch lacks some modern conveniences, like smoke and carbon monoxide detectors).

Let the party begin…

This weekend turned out to be a special occasion in that one of the regulars to Mike’s was having his birthday party there. His name was Cliff Matlock and he had invited a bunch of his motorcycling friends to come up. He said he celebrated every birthday at Mikes, but this one was his 50th. My son made the observation that only in California could you invite 50 motorcyclists and 50 riders would show up. If he lived in Virginia, he’d be lucky to even know 50 people that rode motorcycles.

Lucky for us that we arrived early, as we got rooms with heaters. Matlock’s friends began to show up—most by motorcycle, but a few by vehicle. We got a head start and good seats at Mike’s bar and soon we were downing margaritas and shots of Tequila (in order to say warm). Marty Tripes and his brother Mike were there hanging out. Marty has put on a couple of pounds since his motocrossing days (who hasn’t), and he showed up wearing sweatpants instead of riding gear. When we asked him about them he said he couldn’t find motocross pants that would fit anymore, so he just wore the sweats when he rode. I don’t know if that was true or not, but if so, he was a wet and cold puppy on the ride in.

Mike’s Bar: Tripes is in the background and has a mustache.

By this time, we were getting hungry and Tim had thoughtfully provided us with a vegetable dip tray (pretty classy for Mike’s) and one of Matlock’s crowd brought in a Mexican bean dip—all of which were made short work of. Later we had our fifth straight Mexican meal of the trip. Mike’s dining room is kind of rustic and homey with picnic tables and your basic food service, but man, we were starving by the time dinner rolled around.

While we were having dinner, Marty Tripes comes over and starts ragging on Bobby and me about KTM (I had on my KTM jacket and Bobby had on a KTM sweatshirt). He said that KTM was German for “kan’t take much”. Then he asked if we were rich (you know where this is going), and I quickly said yes, to get on the offensive, but to no avail. And, of course, he said that we had to be rich to afford to ride them.

Bobby takes over now and says that we even have our own mechanic (we don’t, but it’s great being friends with Sam Chalk, the KTM rep), and this stumps Marty for a second; he’s probably figuring that we hang out with Fabio and Lyle Lovitt (two other famous KTM faithful). Before this goes any further, I tell Marty to make himself useful and take a picture of our group with my new digital camera, which he graciously does.

Marty Tripe’s group dinner picture, clockwise: Me, Randy and his son Jeremy (McGrath); Marc (the ex-speedway racer; Tim Morton (we made him sit at the head of the table in order to get the check); Chris (ex-pro motocrosser); Dr. Jondy (orthopedic surgeon checking out potential new business from Chris); Tom Morton (Tim’s dad), and Bobby (my son).

After dinner, we hang out and party with Matlock’s and Tripe’s group, but by 9:30 I’m ready for the sack (remember, we’re three hours behind) and stagger off to my room. Lights go out at 10:00 anyway, when Mike turns off the generators, but I’m pretty sure that didn’t stop the birthday party from continuing on.

Next installment: Riding for real in the Baja.